What happened?This book is the equivalent of meeting someone you knew, maybe a former crush, a few years down the road. You run into them at a Walmart. The charming, charismatic, svelte young man you once knew has now become a blearly-eyed, beer-bellied, bloated ghost of his former self, holding a 6-pack of Corona Light as he trudges lifelessly towards the checkout.Seriously, what the fuck happened?So rarely have I seen a series degenerate so much as to be unrecognizable from its previous book. I would blame it on second-book syndrome, but to do so would mean that I would have to reconcile the fact that these two books are part of the same series. And like a very embarrassing sibling, the first book really, really should be distancing itself from this tragedy of a sequel.Generally, I start off my book sequel reviews with a disclaimer that goes something like "READ THE FIRST BOOK, YOU WILL BE HOPELESSLY LOST IF YOU DO NOT." Not for this book, no. This book can almost be a standalone. The action starts right away, but I don't believe anyone starting from this book will get lost. Partially because the background is fairly adequately explained throughout the book, partially because, really, does anyone need an explanation for a vampire apocalypse? But mostly because our main character, Katie, is such a different character as to be completely unrecognizable from the first book to the current one.In short, Katie turned from an innocent Amish girl, with understandable questions about faith, into a hypocritical, sanctimonious, self-righteous little bitch.The thing I loved about the first book is that, while the main character is religious, while the community within it is religious, religion is never shoved down our throat. It was a story about faith and about fear, about persecution and a dawning horror of an outside intrusion.This book went a complete 180 where religion is concerned. It is so overwhelmingly religious. God, Judas, the Bible, so many aspects of the Christian religion are presented to us by Katie. God this. The Lord that. I think my friend JennyJen counted the number of mentions of "God" in her review, and it came to a pretty ridiculous number (well over 100). It is as if Katie completely turns towards her religion once she has been banished from her community; she clings to it as if it were a lifeboat. She prays so much. It really is an inordinate and unacceptable amount of dumping of Christianity onto the unexpecting. I don't think I'm being unfair here, I am not a religious person, but I knew what I was getting into...I read the first book. I didn't have a problem with the religiousness in the first, but the overwhelming religious overtones was just too much here, it was unneeded, and largely unnecessary.For example, Katie tells Alex the story of Tobit, Tobias, and Sarah. It's about Sarah losing seven husbands and Tobit going blind, and Tobias saving them both (and he gets the girl, YEAH!). The moral of the story is:“The story is beloved by the Amish for its example of faithfulness and servitude to God. For perseverance in the face of overwhelming odds.”NO, IT'S NOT. That's only what Katie says! I don't get it! There was no point to the story in the context of the situation. To me, it didn't have the message that it is supposed to have had, according to how Katie explained it. The Biblical story and so many other religious references in the book came off as completely extraneous to the story.There's also the inclusion of the crazy-ass Pentecostal man, who speaks in tongues and is literally draped in live, writhing snakes. And what happens when Katie is bitten by a venomous snake and is about to die? THEY PRAY OUT THE VENOM, Y'ALL.“The only thing that can save her from poison is to be full of the Holy Spirit. We have to pray.”Sigh.And of course, it worked.Let's not even mention the ridiculousness of the science, considering the fact that copperhead venom is RARELY FATAL. Seriously, you'd probably need to actually french-kiss a copperhead to get the unfortunate snake to release enough venom to kill you (before it wants to kill itself).Another problem I have with Katie throughout the book is the hypocrisy of her faith. Katie picks and chooses her morals to suit her needs in certain situations. Sleeping with Alex? That's just fine. Doing certain things to save your own fucking life? GOD WOULDN'T WANT ME TO DO THAT. PLAIN PEOPLE WOULDN'T DO THAT. Plain people do this. Plain people do that. Plain people are so much morally fucking superior than you in every way, you dumb Englisher. Katie doesn't know the fucking meaning of adaptation if it bit her in the ass like that poor copperhead.Her religiousness results in some extremely idiotic behaviors on Katie's part that literally puts her, Ginger, and Alex's life in danger. Right off the bat, she refuses to take off her bonnet. Despite the fact that it attracts the attention of every fucking vampire in the vicinity.He grabbed my elbow. He tore the white bonnet off my head, stuffed it into his pocket.I snatched at the strings. “Don’t...”“This thing makes you a target. I could see you from all the way back there.” He stabbed a thumb at Ginger’s retreating figure on horseback, melting into the grass. “It shines like a beacon.”I lifted my chin. “Ja. Maybe it should.”This was an argument we repeated often. Though the end of the world had come, I adhered to the old ways. I was born Amish, and I would die Amish.(Alex still insists on calling Katie "Bonnet." It's just another thing that really pissed me off. She has a fucking name.)Oh, and Alex? He's going to hell. Katie knows he's going to hell. She loves him and all, and she'll stick by his side no matter what, and he'll do the same for her. But still, he's a bad Christian, a horrible nonbeliever, and he's going to hell.I closed my eyes and prayed in the darkness, prayed that Alex would survive, even though he had turned his back on God’s plan for his human form.I was pretty sure that even if he did survive, God would not accept him into heaven, no matter how much he might repent for it later. The only lifetime he would have was this one, here on earth.^___________^I still can't believe how many idiotic situation Katie gets into...and survives. Her decision-making process seems to pinpoint her towards the path that would get her party killed fastest, Katie is so fucking TSTL. She has completely moronic reactions to situations, based on her faith and what it doesn't allow her to do, despite the fact that what she believes God wants her to do will get her eaten as a midnight snack.As I said, she picks and chooses her morality. Like when she releases a bunch of ravenous carnivores from their cages (lions, tigers, and bears, oh my!) regardless of the fact that they would probably all eat her alive, because they are skin-and-bones-starved. And there's no reason why they shouldn't. The animals are caged by a previous owner, and have been without food and water since their owner left. AND KATIE WANTS TO SET THEM FREE, FREE LIKE THE FUCKING WIND.I swallowed, stared out the kitchen window at the scrawny animals in their enclosures. “We can’t leave them out there.”“They’ll eat us alive if we let them go now,” Ginger said.I shook my head. “No,” I said. “We can’t. I can’t, and I won’t.”The plot is unbelievably stupid. Once again, Deus ex machina is at play. I HATE IT. I seriously fucking hate the use of coincidence and happenstance as a plot device. Too many things happen by accident, there are way too many far too close calls for the story to even approach credibility. Alex shows up at just the right moment, despite supposedly being far, far away from her. People emerge out of no-fucking-where. A fucking wolf brings them rabbits when they're hungry. And they name him Fenrir. Isn't that just cute?! Coochie coochie coo!!!! Who's an adorable wittle wolf? Fenrir is!Fucking kill me, please.I don't even want to go into the "science" that we encounter along the way. Partially because I don't want to spoil certain events, mostly because I don't really feel like writing another page ranting on the scientific implausibility and, really, just how utterly unfuckingbelievably stupid it is to incorporate plant-based phosphorescence into a human being not in vitro. And let's not even get into the positive and negative vibes of water molecules. It's the viiiiiiiiiibes, maaaaaaaaaan! Think positively! You'll get prettier snowflakes. No, really. This fucking book.The only redemption this book has is the vampires. These vampires are pretty bad-ass, and I really wished we saw more of them as like...sentient vampires, and not just bits of vicious, sibilant whispers in the darkness. More vampires (specifically, vampire nuns), less Katie. That's what this book needed.
